They Don't Know
by Dementia-12
Summary: ShonenAi. Ryo and Dee have spent a lot of time together...but what happens when the patience ends? How long can a relationship last when crucial words come too late? R&R's welcome! Hope you like it! Discontinued
1. They Don't Know: Chapter 1

  
Notes: Hi! ^_^ I started writing this year's ago but than let it sit on a disk for years. I hope you like it!   
It still isn't done but hopefully with time (and plenty of kind R&R's ;), I'll finish it. ^_^ Enjoy! 

  
// = Denotes song lyrics  
Rated: PG (maybe possible change in future)  
Song by Tracey Ullman - "They Don't Know"  
Genre: Shonen-ai   
Sub-Genres: Angst, H/C, Romance, Drama 

****

  
They Don't Know   
By Dementia_12 

  
[At Ryo's Apartment]   
  
Ryo looked over at Dee, who was battling Vikky for the thousandth time. Dee had made the mistake of mocking Vikky and pinching his cheek, earning a swift kick to the gut. 

He sighed, as he tossed a Caesar salad for dinner. It was no use to try to break them up; he had learned that a long time ago and had a bruise on his leg that had yet to heal to prove it. Not that Dee didn't try to kiss it better... 

__

//You've been around for such a long time now// 

How long has it been now? How long have we been together, as partners and as friends?   
He mentally calculated as he stooped to pick up the salad dressing from the lower shelf of the fridge.  
It's been...just over 2 years. 

Amazing! He's withstood Dee's advances, and teasing, for nearly two entire years!  
  
Shaking his head, he couldn't help a little smile from forming. Taking all the food he prepared to the small dining table, he heard a groan and walked into the living room to see Dee lying face down on the floor with a bump on his head.

"Dee?"   
Another groan permeated the air. Ryo crouched down as Dee tried to sit up only to collapse back down.  
"Dee, you can't defeat a little boy in a fight? That's just sad."   
Dee turned his face toward him with an angry frown on his face. "That kid is the spawn of Satan." he said meaningfully.   
"Okay, Dee." Ryo responded in an obviously patronizing tone, earning a growl from the invalid on the floor.   
A moment of silence passed. __

//Oh maybe I could leave you but I don't know how.// 

Dee felt a tug on his hair and he waved a hand in the air in an irritated fashion.  
"Leave me alone, Ryo. -- Just leave me here to die of my crippling wounds that your Devil child has left me with."  
Ryo laughed at that. "Where is Vikky, anyway?"  
"Cal's."

Ryo frowned disapprovingly. "Now he'll miss my dinner!"  
Dee valiantly raised himself up into a sitting position, finally successful. 

"Spawn doesn't deserve your wonderful meal, anyway."

Ryo just raised an eyebrow at him and stood, gesturing for Dee to do the same.  
"C'mon. Let's eat."   
They walked to the table and sat, readying themselves with a prayer of thanks to Kami-sama. 

They ate quietly, leaving each to their private thoughts. Ryo chewed on his grilled fish and as he continued, he heard Dee's murmurs of appreciation for his efforts in their cuisine. 

"Dee."   
Dee stopped short of forking more fish into his mouth, "Huh?"   
"Did you know it's been nearly two years since we've known each other?"   
Dee placed his fork in his plate, and sighed as he ran a hand through his long bangs.   
"Yeah, I know." 

Ryo blinked in surprise.   
"You sounded a little...sad about that." he questioned curiously.   
"Maybe I am a little."   
Not knowing how to respond, Ryo kept his silence. 

Why would Dee be sad for having been friends for this long? It didn't make sense.   
He knew for a fact that Dee liked his company; he practically lived with Vikky and him.   
"I've been thinking about us recently. We're getting nowhere. I mean, together." __

//And why should I be lonely every night// 

Dee watched for Ryo's reaction. A flicker of hurt and confusion passed through his eyes.   
"What are you talking about?"   
"Look, I know I'm being abrupt and all but.... Well, I'm not happy. And I've been thinking about it, and actually went to the Convent the other day to talk to Sister about it, and she says I deserve to be happy.   
I'd never...we've--we want different things."   
"Dee, you're not making sense.", Ryo said rationally.   
Dee looked up and held his gaze, assuring himself that Ryo was focused on his next words. 

"Ryo, I love you." 

*** 

Saying Ryo was shocked would have been a gross understatement. The word "poleaxe" came to mind. 

Dee watched Ryo try to form a sentence but it apparently wouldn't come out. Dee himself couldn't believe what he was saying, but felt it was long past due. Not that that kind of reasoning lessened the hurt at all. It hurt like hell. Especially knowing that the man he loved didn't feel the same way in the least. 

Shit, it had taken this long to realize what a one-sided relationship -- Dee gave a mental snicker at the last word -- he had with Ryo. 

He'd push, Ryo pulled.   
He'd pounce, Ryo would run.   
He'd move for a hug, and Ryo would look stricken at his closeness. 

It wasn't worth the grief he'd been secretly harbouring alongside the hope he had in his heart. Ryo had made it clear a thousand times over that he had never wanted him, but had tolerated him for only God-know-why. 

Well, if Ryo was too polite to do it, he would have to. 

*** 

__

//When I can be with you - oh yes you make it right// 

"No words, Ryo? That's too bad. I waited all this time to spring this on you, only to end up having you do a really bad fish impersonation." 

Dee's mocking words broke through to Ryo's consciousness and he snapped his mouth shut.   
Yet the erratic pounding rhythm of his heart which pulsed since Dee's declaration continued. 

"Anou...Dee, this isn't something you get to hear everyday.... I'm not sure what to say.", Ryo responded tentatively.   
Black strands of hair fell into Dee's eyes as he turned slightly away from his partner in justice.   
"Yeah, well, you don't spend as much time with JJ as I do, then." 

Sharp jade eyes locked on befuddled dark brown ones.   
"It doesn't matter anyways, Ryo." 

Dee stood up as Ryo watched his motions in bewilderment.   
Dee loves me, but it doesn't matter? Ryo thought in a haze of confusion. 

It was what he had always wanted! 

He sat dumbly as Dee picked up his jacket and swung it over his shoulder.   
It was then he realized that Dee was leaving! The thought galvanized Ryo into motion.   
He rushed in front of Dee who was about to exit without another word and blocked his path by plastering himself against the door. 

"Matte!"   
"Randy, move."   
Ryo gasped in surprise at the use of his English name on Dee's lips.   
The one person he had always been "Ryo" to.   
The person who always made his name sound like he was rehearsing the most poetic endearment was now curtly calling him "Randy", like some stranger.   
That hurt more than Dee could have possibly known.   
Or maybe as much as it was meant to hurt. 

"Dee."   
Inwardly, Dee heard the sadness he had caused in Ryo by deliberately using his other name, but it was time to let things go. Things had to change.   
Or maybe he wanted Ryo to feel at least a small resemblance of the pain he was feeling. 

_ //And I don't listen to the guys who say// _

"Spit it out or move, okay?"   
"Okay!" came the annoyed response at being rushed but Ryo took in a deep breath and began to slowly speak.   
"Dee, about what you said...well, I--I think it matters."   
Anticipating seeing an effect to those words, he was left disappointed but continued.   
"What...well, I'm trying to say is that I...feel the same way." 

A face cut in stone gazed back at him, and frustration at Dee for making things harder made his voice stronger.   
"Dammit Dee! You could make things easier! I love you, too, okay!?" As the words left his mouth, Ryo was mortified at how he could take his long guarded secret and shout them at the person he loved like an insult. 

__

//That you're bad for me and I should turn you away// 

His face flushed furiously in shame and residual anger, now aimed at himself, but he dared to look at Dee in hopes to see his toothy grin once again. 

No... 

The face that looked back at him was devoid of expression.   
How could that be?! 

No,... actually there was the tiniest angry spark glowing in the embers of green fire but its appearance seemed out-of-place to Ryo. 

But alarming. 

Dee placed a hand on Ryo's shoulder and it bit into his flesh as he was forcefully moved out of the way.   
Dee threw the door open and left, slamming it closed with a resounding bang. __

//'Cause they don't know 'bout us// 

Rubbing his shoulder lightly, he gazed at the closed door for a moment before sitting down before the two cold fish dinners.   
What had just happened here? he asked himself.   
  
Dee left you.... Whispering pain from his heart echoed this sentiment.   
It's over..... Chanted the tear that rolled down his cheek.   
He hates you now.... Murmured the bruises from his shoulders.   
He laid his hands on the table in disbelief.   
No, that can't be...   
He hates you now...his body throbbed in unison.   
Ryo's face crumpled at the very real possibility and buried his face in his hands as anguish overcame him.   
_  
//And they've never heard of love// _

To be continued….


	2. They Don't Know: Chapter 2

****

[27th Police Precinct of the NYPD]

It feels like months since we argued instead of just weeks, Ryo thought for at least the seventh time that morning. The same thought repeated itself in his head ever since that terrible evening.

At least he hasn't called me Randy since, he thought to himself.

But he knew Dee simply continued to call him Ryo for the simple reason as to not arise curiosity.

The explanation would be too involved and Ryo knew that it would be something he would want to hear.

He watched Dee from across the room now, for Dee had moved his desk away from his. When asked why by the others, Dee proclaimed loudly that he had wanted a change of view, having looked at the same one for so long. Ryo had looked at Dee then to find him looking back at him solemnly for a moment before turning his head away. Not for the first time, Ryo felt a familiar prickling at his eyes and he surreptitiously wiped at them, hoping no one noticed his sudden influx of emotion.

__

//I get a feeling when I look at you// 

Dee was sprawled lazily in his seat, drinking from his cocky "#1 Lover" coffee mug in his right hand and reading the report he held in the left. He looked careless, casual, and relaxed and inside Ryo couldn't help but resent him for it.

Judging by their present actions, the casual observer never would have guessed at how they felt. 

But by one who knows them would have been an entirely different story.

Dee laughed as jovially as he ever did, arrogant and cocky in his actions and deeds; to the entire world he would seem fine and happy.

But Ryo could see the faint changes in the one he loved from afar. The laughter did not reach those once-smiling green eyes, nor did the brash words have the intensity of its past.

And he knew he was no better, and his pretending seemed to earn him more sympathy than he could bear.

Bikky and Cal did not know what had happened but it became obvious when Dee's near-daily visits and suppertime infringements ceased abruptly.

His colleagues seem to sense the change in him as well. He had never been overly talkative with his closet co-workers for he had never really felt his quiet nature had a place with them. Yet apparently they knew him better than he realized and offered compassion for a problem they knew nothing about.

And so everything felt worse.

__

//Wherever you go now, I wanna be there too// 

They had been assigned new partners. 

Though Dee had not discussed it with him, Ryo knew he had asked Commissioner Rose for the change. Rose had only been too happy to grant the request, Dee not even needing to provide more than a thin reason about wanting to work with someone who might have a different perspective than Ryo when working on cases.

Yet when they had worked as partners in justice against the crimes of New York City, they had been an unstoppable force. Everyone knew it. But Rose conveniently forgot that fact, most likely due to his misplaced and unwanted affections.

Rose "graciously" offered Ryo to become his partner in front of everyone. Ryo very much wanted to refuse, but the decision was already made really. What could he say anyway? That he feared his virtue was in danger?

It just wasn't done.

__

//They say we're crazy but I just don't care//

Dee went without a partner for what felt like a long time. His former partner was silently glad of it.

He didn't want to see anyone take his place. 

Being assigned to become Dee's partner had ended up being the most fortunate, exciting thing to ever happen to him and he didn't want to share.

__

//And if they keep on talkin' still they get nowhere// 

Diana. She was back.

The F.B.I had assigned her a new and difficult case and her successors had believed that they would require some police assistance.

Diana fluttered though the precinct like a zephyr, gliding in quietly with a smile. However the graceful image was broken when she spoke, smacking her lips as she chewed her cheery bubblegum and sashaying towards Rose's office.

Ryo watched as she went past and thought to greet her. As he opened his mouth, Diana's voice suddenly rang forth.

"Dee!" she called out happily, waved a manicured hand. 

Ryo observed quietly as he watched the beautiful and flamboyant lady sauntered up to Dee, who comically raised his hands in an "Oh No! It's Diana!" gesture. She raised an arched eyebrow at that in an equally playful manner and leaned over to kiss on the cheek. Pulling back, Diana chided him for being a naughty cop while brushing lightly at the red smear of lipstick off his cheek. Dee offered her a charming smile in response that made their observer's gut clutch in remembrance.

He's never going to smile at me that way ever again...

__

//So I don't mind if they don't understand// 

Diana never noticed him as Dee escorted her to Rose's office, though it was only a few mere steps away.

She smiled at him and pulled out a card from her long coat, and handed him what looked like a business card.

Her phone number, Ryo realized with a sick feeling. 

A part of him chastised himself instantly at the instinctive feeling of despair. 

Dee wouldn't call her; he's not interested in her.

Dee took the card, his face reflecting surprise as if he was startled than Diana was interested in him.

Ryo called Dee and himself seven kinds of idiots then.

Of course she interested, Baka! She kissed you before, didn't she?

Part of Ryo knew that his logic wasn't practical, for she had kissed him once as well.

"But she kissed you to get Dee's and Rose's attention, it was about Dee then, too! She wants him." Ryo bitterly reminded himself.

Diana stepped into Rose's office with a farewell wink to Dee, and stepped inside, closing the door. 

Dee was still looking at the card, lost in thought.

Ryo observed him, eyes capturing the tall dark figure to memory once again and hoping against hope that Dee would not tear him further apart by dating Diana.

Ryo stifled a gasp as Dee suddenly looked at him for the first time in forever. The green gaze looked at him searchingly, probing for an answer Ryo did not know how to give but at the same time desperately wanting to.

Their gazes locked and Ryo's breathing started to become slightly erratic.

Dee...

I don't know what went wrong, but please forgive me for whatever it is I've done to send you away...

__

//When I look at you when you hold my hand//

Noise fell away and the table and desks disappeared. It was only Dee, looking at him with his soft black hair brushing his jade-coloured eyes.

He stepped forward, as Ryo watched. Foot after foot brought Dee in front of his desk and Ryo stood up to look the man he loved in his hypnotically sorrowful eyes.

Dark eyes absorbed each movement of the man in front of him, not wanting to miss a single motion.

Dee's lips parted, but no words came out. Ryo could hear the slight exhalation escaping him and felt his anxious heart beginning to thrum faster in his chest.

A strong hand slowly moved from Dee's side and was held out before him. The hand held Diana's business card and offered it to Ryo to do with as he saw fit. 

Hesitating for barely a moment, Ryo plucked the card out of Dee's hand. Keeping Dee's gaze, mostly because he was immersing himself in the feeling of finally not being ignored by his loved one, he plucked the card out of Dee's hand. Allowing a small piece of his frustration to enter his expression, he crushed the card in his fist. 

Dee watched his actions calmly then nodded and moved to go back to his desk. 

The noisy world returned once again to Ryo as Dee began to walk away. 

"Dee, please wait. Please."

Ryo knew in his heart that this had been Dee's way of showing him that he still cared for him and would take no one in his place, but so much more was needed. Things had to change. They had to. 

He felt like he was dying inside.

He needed his life force back, he needed to be needed again, to be madly lusted after again, and most essentially of all, he needed to be loved again.

To be loved by Dee.

__

//'Cause they don't know 'bout us// 

"Dee, please talk to me.... We need to talk about how we left things."

He rarely saw Dee as quiet as he was now. Even in the direst of situations, Dee was outspoken and opinionated. He was not like this, not like he was now.

Dee did not respond for full minute, just stood before him with a look unknown to Ryo in his eyes. 

"Come to my place tonight. We can't talk now.", uttered Dee in an unusual monotone.

Tears of hope welled up in Ryo's eyes and he nodded quickly so Dee would not have a chance to change his mind.

"Tonight.", Ryo murmured softly and he thought he saw a flicker of warmth that spiral through Dee's eyes before they became serious once again. 

Dee nodded. 

"Tonight."

And walked away with Ryo's shadowed gaze trailing after him.

//And they've never heard of love// 

To be continued…


	3. They Don't Know: Chapter 3

_Notes: Thanks to all the encouragement from my reviewers! (the kind ones anyway ^^;;;) I didn't know this story was still in me to write but I'm definitely glad it was! ^_^ (Though of course, we are still not done with Dee and Ryo yet! ;) Thanks again and I hope you enjoy it! ** Un-betaed by anyone but me and spell checker. ^//^ **_

******** 

[Dee's Neighbourhood]

Dee's neighbourhood almost bordered on the ghetto. As Ryo cautiously stepped through the dirtier ranks of New York, he wondered as to why Dee would live in such an area. As a cop, he knew he could afford a place in as nice a neighbourhood as his, so it was just confusing.

__

//Why should it matter to us if they don't approve// 

But it didn't matter. He knew he travel through much worse to get to Dee, especially when the situation was as dire as it was. He just didn't want to think about the possible outcomes - why Dee was really having him over.

Maybe he's going to tell me to stop staring at him like I have been - I can only guess at what I must look like. So yearning and despairing, like a lost soul who can see his salvation within one tempting step. Or maybe he'll say that he's changed his mind, and say he really wasn't in love but in intense lust?

Or maybe...and this was the invariable hope Ryo latched onto.... Maybe he wants to explain what happened, why he left so furiously, and say...he still loves me and will never leave me again...

Wrapping his coat around himself from a shivering that came from within, he looked up to see that he was two houses away from Dee's apartment and he summoned his strength.

Give me strength, Kami-Sama, Ryo said in a short mantra as he climbed up the stairs to Dee's building.

Once inside, he searched out Dee's name and pressed the buzzer for entrance.

Dee's deep voice surprised him and he jumped a bit, cursing his own agitation.

"Hello?"

"Dee, It's Ryo."

Ryo heard a slight pause and wondered for a split second if Dee would send him away when he heard Dee quickly say, "Come on up." followed by a buzzing sound.

The elevator took a long time, though it seemed a wonder that the rickety contraption could function at all.

Once inside, Ryo punched the three and waited, urging his mind to go blank so as to not allow any more off the mind-numbing tension already surging through his body to escalate.

The doors shuddered and slid slowly open and Ryo stepped out, thankful that he hadn't been trapped inside.

That would've started off the evening beautifully.

Choosing to turn right in the small hallway, he found Dee's apartment and stood outside the door, nerve addled and wary.

His hand however seemed more eager than his mind for it reached out on knocked on the door before Ryo realized what it was doing.

__

//We should just take our chances while we've got nothing to lose Baby//

A blink of light from the peephole appeared almost immediately and the door swung open and then there was Dee, hair in its customary disarray and green eyes enigmatic as they peered back at Ryo.

Ryo just looked back, feeling an odd inexplicable sense of deja-vu of Dee looking the exact same way to him once before but couldn't quite recollect when or where.

Trying to remember as to when Dee had looked so incredible to him as he did in this moment, Dee gestured to come inside.

Taking in his surroundings as he steeped into the small apartment, he heard Dee murmur behind him, "Welcome to my humble little shack."

Turning to face him, Ryo gave Dee a tentative smile. "I've been here before, Dee." he replied, eyes tracking Dee as he picked up a lit cigarette sitting in an ashtray on low coffee table. Plopping himself down, Dee sat on the floor, his back propped against the couch as he waved his hand at Ryo to sit.

Regarding his former partner as he blew out a white puff of smoke, Dee replied indifferently with a casual, "You were here once. More than a year ago. I'm amazed you remembered at all."

"I didn't know it had been that long." Ryo responded as he settling himself on the ground next to Dee, feeling a growingly familiar pang resonating in his chest when Dee seemed to shift away from him. He had never known Dee to be this distant to him. How could he get things back to the way they were when things were so bad between them now?

"Time seems to pass by without you noticing, Ryo."

Not knowing how to respond, he murmured a quiet "Ah." while looking at the floorboards across the room. 

__

//There's no need for living in the past// 

A creeping silence invaded the room for a minute, tense and inhibiting. Hands tightening into fists, Ryo didn't know what to do. Dee seemed so daunting right now. Didn't he want to fix things? 

Swallowing, Ryo gathered up his courage to say something he hoped would be relevant when Dee heaved a big sigh next to him, drawing his eye. Running a hair through dark locks, Dee looked blankly ahead as Ryo studied his profile. 

"Ryo." Dee said shortly.

"Yes?"

"Why did you come here tonight?"

"You invited me, Dee." Ryo answered after a startled second.

A finger dipped into the ashes of a long dead cigarette. Drawing in the grey grain, Dee made a derogatory sound. "You said we needed to talk. You're not talking about whatever the hell you want to talk about so I can't talk back. I invited you so you could talk. So talk."

Ryo felt a stir of annoyance in him and his lips pressed together as he focused his gaze on the evocative man in front of him. His irritation gave him courage. "Ok, I'll talk. Why did you leave that last time? I don't understand how you could have just left when were talking about such important things. We need to clear things up!" 

Jade eyes snapped to hazel ones in anger.

"What isn't clear? That was the most clear we have ever been to one another!" Hands started gesturing and grey bits of ash leapt into the air. 

Dee's quick temper began to grow as he continued to speak, feelings long unsaid coming to the forefront. "I chase you and I chase you, hoping and waiting that some day - maybe! - you would return a little grain, a speck of my feelings." Dee's face loomed in front of Ryo's shaken visage. It hadn't taken much to get Dee to open up but he could never stay silent when he felt he was being wrongly accused of something. 

Ryo began moving backward but Dee kept coming, not letting his chance for an emotional purging to escape. Dee wanted to make sure Ryo knew what it was like being on his side of the pursuit. Ryo had to know what it was really like for him because his onetime partner, the source of all his woes and fleeting glimpses of bliss, had no idea whatsoever.

__

//Now I've found good lovin' gonna make it last// 

"You can't guess what it's like, can you, Ryo? To want someone so bad to want you back, to give a damn - to love me!!" A hand fisted in Ryo's collar as his back bump up against the back wall. Gasping as he was pulled to face Dee eye-to-eye, he trembled at the depths brimming within them. How had he missed all this??

"You said you loved me...but you don't. Time doesn't move for you because you're already happy. You don't need me or want me because you have a family. You're loved...and I love you. Too much...I made you my everything and now I'm trapped in my love for you." Losing steam at a frightening speed, Dee's fingers slackened and climbed to caress Ryo's face. Touching his forehead to Ryo's, he closed his eyes with a shuddering breath. 

Tears streamed from Ryo's open eyes as guilt encased his heart. His hands were clinging to Dee's shirtsleeves, knuckles white with frustration.

So much had been hidden; so much had been building in his partner for these last two years...why didn't I know? 

They stayed that way for a long time. Minutes or hours ticked passed without notice. 

The brief shrieking of car alarm outdoors broke the melancholy haze and Dee began to pull back but Ryo wouldn't let him go. 

"Ryo, let go."

"No."

"Ryo."

"I never will, Dee." Red eyes peered up into another set of red eyes. Ryo swallowed and pressed a hand against Dee's damp cheek lightly.

"Please believe me. I love you." Grabbing Dee's head when Dee began to shake his head at Ryo's words, he willed the green-eyed man to trust in him. "I do." he said fervently and pulled Dee's head down for a kiss.

__

//I tell the others 'Don't bother me//

God. So long...it felt so long since he had last tasted Dee's lips. The texture alone caused a gluttonous sound to escape from him. Winding his arms around Dee's back, he was kissed back voraciously. Sweet...tantalizing...consuming...

Dee's sinuous tongue reamed through his lips, pausing to coyly slide itself across the sensitive roof of Ryo's mouth. His body temperature spiked up ten degrees when he felt Ryo taking over by sucking on his tongue, his greedy fingers trying to press them even closer together. He could feel Ryo's hands everywhere on his body, palms pressing and learning his body. His eyes shot open when he felt them wandering past his belt buckle and beyond. 

The concept of breathing soon became a foreign thing as sensations took over. Melting backward onto the ground, Dee was hazily aware of Ryo's flushed face above him. 

So beautiful. My Ryo is so beautiful. Pink cheeks, pink tongue, pink lips...red eyes...red eyes...red eyes.

Red eyes. 

From tears.  
Because Ryo feels bad.  
He was crying.  
For him.  
Because Ryo...doesn't love him.

"STOP!"

__

//' Cause when they look at you they don't see what I see//

Dee sat up quickly and shoved Ryo away violently, causing the other man to almost hit the wall.

"Dee!!" Ryo cried.

"Shut up!!" Dee shouted back at him, covering his face as he tried to gain back his composure.

Ryo stared at Dee's back, tight with strain, in astonishment. Hesitant, he waited and tried to ignore his angry erection without success.

He wanted Dee. He wanted to show Dee that he wasn't alone. He wanted to give him proof that he was loved.

"Could you go home now, Ryo?"

Go home? 

"No. No way."

__

//No I don't listen to their wasted lines//

A heavy sigh dropped Dee's shoulders down into a slumped position. Ryo watched as Dee wearily stood up and watched him carefully as he turned to face him. He looked sad and so very tired.

"Aren't you satisfied yet, Ryo? We talked, we vented, and we kissed and made up. Now we can go on with our lives, can't we?"

Slowly standing, Ryo shook his head. "I'm not satisfied. You stopped me before I could."

A derisive scoff answered him. "I'm not talking about -"

"Neither am I." Ryo interrupted boldly, still riding on waves of assertiveness from their near love making. 

"You're stopping me now. You're pulling away from me. You won't let me -" 

"What?" Dee retaliated, cutting Ryo off. "You don't like being stopped? Having to shut down when all you can think about is 'I want to show him how I feel'?" 

He grabs a cigarette from the carton of the coffee table and lights it. Taking a deep draw, the cigarette somehow magically restores some of Dee's bearings. Exhaling, Dee looks at Ryo and calmly murmurs "You don't have to concern yourself with that anymore."

__

//Got my eyes wide open and I see the signs//

"Dee-"

"Please go now. I'd like to be by myself and we have to wake up early for work tomorrow."

Ryo looked at the clock on the VCR under Dee's small TV and saw that it was well past midnight. Bikky and Cal would be worried about him.

"Bikky and Cal must be worried by now."

Ryo looked at Dee in bewilderment and Dee laughed. 

"Your eyes give you away, Ryo." Dee said with what sounded like affection in his voice. It gave Ryo hope for a split second and he took a step towards the dark-haired man when a sharp "Don't." halted him.

A wave of helplessness enveloped him. He didn't want to leave Dee - not like this. Nothing had been fixed. 

"Alright. Time to go. Way past time to tuck the kids in, Ryo." Dee pressed, urging him to leave. Another cigarette was butted out of existence and Dee was pushing him toward the door.

"Bye bye. Thanks for the visit. See ya tomorrow-" Dee rambled as he tried to practically threw Ryo out the door but Ryo wasn't budging. 

__

// 'Cause they don't know 'bout us//

"Dee? Dee, listen to me and I'll go, alright?"

A huff was followed by a muttered, "Fine."

Dee leaned against the doorjamb, one leg bent at the knee, looking deceptively collected. Leaning against the doorjamb, Ryo mirrored Dee's confident and relaxed pose, knees brushing against each other with intent. He would say his peace and go. 

"I just want you to know that I'm not giving up on you. I'm going to bug you and bother you, kiss you and hug you until you believe that I want to be with you. I want you to understand that I do want you and need you. I need you to be happy."

His smooth tone contradicted the seriousness of his words and how profoundly he felt them. 

"I'll prove myself to you." 

Ryo moved towards Dee and gave him a brief but warm kiss, rich with promise.

"I love you," Ryo whispered against Dee's parted lips. "And I'll never let you doubt it again." He murmured a soft "Oyasumi." with a farewell smile full of devotion. 

Ryo could feel the weight of Dee's eyes linger on him as he walked down the hall and knew a sense of hope he had all but forgotten over the last few weeks. 

This was not over. They were meant to be together.

I promise you, Dee. 

I promise...

This will be the last time we will ever be apart.

__

//And they've never heard of love// 

To be continued...


End file.
